








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 227 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 306 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2486 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,577 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 222 | 9% |
| Smokes | 477 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1221 | 47% |
| Molotovs | 657 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $157,852 of utility $17 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Poli2009 | 60% | 25 |
| #2 | NO VAC VERIFIZIERUNG | 57% | 23 |
| #3 | ✯ Комиссар ✯ | 49% | 59 |
| #4 | *ᴾʳʸAzRa* | 49% | 45 |
| #5 | Supernaturalsuchti | 48% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Supernaturalsuchti | 48% | 85 |
| #6 | marekbott | 47% | 32 |
| #7 | DevelPlay | 45% | 267 |
| #8 | Reaper | 36% | 44 |
| #9 | NoHonor.PENTA | 31% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DevelPlay | 27 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | Supernaturalsuchti | 13 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | marekbott | 6 | 0.0090 |
| #4 | ✯ Комиссар ✯ | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | *ᴾʳʸAzRa* | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DevelPlay | 362 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #2 | ✯ Комиссар ✯ | 147 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #3 | Supernaturalsuchti | 133 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | NoHonor.PENTA | 114 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #5 | Reaper | 71 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NoHonor.PENTA | +2.18 | 68 | 67 |
| #2 | ✯ Комиссар ✯ | +1.32 | 46 | 57 |
| #3 | Supernaturalsuchti | +1.16 | 50 | 35 |
| #4 | DevelPlay | +0.88 | 50 | 58 |
| #5 | NO VAC VERIFIZIERUNG | +0.35 | 52 | 49 |





