








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1037 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 202 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 65 matches | ||
| Wingman | 59 matches | ||
| Faceit | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3631 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,439 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3908 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3093 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2634 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1804 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,051,208 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 341 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⓽ | 57% | 44 |
| #2 | Cfoxey | 54% | 185 |
| #3 | Ru1d | 50% | 173 |
| #4 | ✪CM z1p | 50% | 127 |
| #5 | szns | 50% | 119 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | larry | 11 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | Cfoxey | 8 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Ru1d | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | ✪CM z1p | 6 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | szns | 6 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | larry | 659 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #2 | Ru1d | 580 | 0.16 | 14 min |
| #3 | ✪CM z1p | 379 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #4 | Cfoxey | 324 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #5 | szns | 292 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Poseidon | +3.92 | 76 | 56 |
| #2 | szns | +2.97 | 87 | 57 |
| #3 | ✪CM z1p | +2.61 | 73 | 52 |
| #4 | ⓽ | +2.52 | 58 | 64 |
| #5 | larry | +1.76 | 63 | 56 |





