








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 120 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 202 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1474 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,665 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1254 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1278 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1982 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 1151 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,226,262 of utility $232 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 26 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JxLayout | 65% | 49 |
| #2 | jonagar | 56% | 91 |
| #3 | Scorbutus | 54% | 179 |
| #4 | ProPottu | 53% | 178 |
| #5 | Por1lainen | 47% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Scorbutus | 54% | 179 |
| #4 | ProPottu | 53% | 178 |
| #5 | Por1lainen | 47% | 17 |
| #6 | PAJU | 45% | 55 |
| #7 | JoL | 44% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jonagar | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | JxLayout | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Scorbutus | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Scorbutus | 525 | 0.14 | 19 min |
| #2 | ProPottu | 385 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #3 | PAJU | 216 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #4 | jonagar | 130 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | JoL | 96 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PAJU | +4.34 | 69 | 76 |
| #2 | JxLayout | +4.21 | 66 | 70 |
| #3 | Por1lainen | +2.22 | 47 | 69 |
| #4 | Scorbutus | +1.81 | 74 | 72 |
| #5 | JoL | +1.16 | 73 | 64 |





