








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 135 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1284 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,853 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1017 | 26% |
| Smokes | 863 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 995 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 978 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $297,609 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 985 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Doss | 63% | 27 |
| #2 | miguelito | 60% | 40 |
| #3 | lil kev | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | fraudy | 51% | 81 |
| #5 | Jojj | 47% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GetMcFucked | 31 | 0.0140 |
| #2 | fraudy | 12 | 0.0076 |
| #3 | miguelito | 5 | 0.0067 |
| #4 | Jojj | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Doss | 3 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GetMcFucked | 591 | 0.27 | 16 min |
| #2 | fraudy | 375 | 0.24 | 12 min |
| #3 | Jojj | 251 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #4 | miguelito | 73 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | Doss | 50 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jojj | +2.27 | 62 | 59 |
| #2 | fraudy | +1.13 | 64 | 75 |
| #3 | Nathan ✿ | +0.54 | 73 | 56 |
| #4 | Doss | +0.03 | 62 | 43 |
| #5 | GetMcFucked | -0.19 | 61 | 76 |





