








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 194 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 122 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Esplay | 17 matches | 1,600 | |
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1903 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,828 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 791 | 16% |
| Smokes | 528 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 2107 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 1402 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $422,398 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Petterschon | 47% | 137 |
| #2 | Knugen special | 45% | 141 |
| #3 | Husmusen | 42% | 69 |
| #4 | Fanky | 42% | 189 |
| #5 | Snappz | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Husmusen | 42% | 69 |
| #4 | Fanky | 42% | 189 |
| #5 | Snappz | 38% | 16 |
| #6 | RileXn | 35% | 20 |
| #7 | Fl1nta | 34% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Knugen special | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | Fanky | 2 | 0.0005 |
| #3 | Petterschon | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Fl1nta | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | RileXn | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Petterschon | 431 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #2 | Knugen special | 425 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | Fanky | 241 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | Fl1nta | 112 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | RileXn | 60 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Petterschon | +1.93 | 75 | 70 |
| #2 | zjesus | +1.32 | 73 | 51 |
| #3 | Knugen special | +0.38 | 77 | 61 |
| #4 | RileXn | +0.34 | 59 | 55 |
| #5 | Fanky | -0.13 | 56 | 56 |





