








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 322 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 372 matches | ||
| Faceit | 142 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5613 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,613 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7715 | 31% |
| Smokes | 5839 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5207 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5852 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,652,708 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1336 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mohis | 62% | 79 |
| #2 | samqpa | 61% | 82 |
| #3 | Muussaaja | 59% | 218 |
| #4 | rudeboy_jamaican | 57% | 178 |
| #5 | kbz | 57% | 252 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Piiskaaja | 17 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Muussaaja | 11 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | juhis | 8 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | samqpa | 6 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | kbz | 5 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Piiskaaja | 1748 | 0.25 | 50 min |
| #2 | Muussaaja | 1021 | 0.23 | 27 min |
| #3 | Korpse | 875 | 0.20 | 27 min |
| #4 | kbz | 628 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #5 | Mohis | 501 | 0.30 | 14 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Muussaaja | +3.45 | 81 | 69 |
| #2 | Mohis | +3.35 | 89 | 75 |
| #3 | Piiskaaja | +3.11 | 84 | 68 |
| #4 | samqpa | +1.92 | 81 | 64 |
| #5 | kbz | +1.15 | 75 | 63 |





