








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1549 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 279 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 111 matches | ||
| Premier | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 43 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 59 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




65 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12995 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,613 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2513 | 13% |
| Smokes | 6519 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 4201 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 6380 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,729,454 of utility $221 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 956 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheOGPotato | 61% | 109 |
| 55% | 568 | ||
| #3 | DukeJean | 55% | 447 |
| 55% | 161 | ||
| #5 | Gooboo Steve | 50% | 353 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| 55% | 568 | ||
| #3 | DukeJean | 55% | 447 |
| 55% | 161 | ||
| #5 | Gooboo Steve | 50% | 353 |
| #6 | unReliableBottomFragger | 42% | 158 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gooboo Steve | 49 | 0.0070 |
| 25 | 0.0022 | ||
| 16 | 0.0050 | ||
| #4 | DukeJean | 13 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | TheOGPotato | 12 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DukeJean | 981 | 0.11 | 23 min |
| 499 | 0.04 | 10 min | ||
| #3 | Gooboo Steve | 303 | 0.04 | 10 min |
| #4 | TheOGPotato | 207 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | unReliableBottomFragger | 121 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boxolotl | +5.28 | 81 | 48 |
| #2 | TheOGPotato | +2.54 | 88 | 45 |
| -0.84 | 80 | 46 | ||
| #4 | Gooboo Steve | -1.61 | 57 | 49 |
| #5 | DukeJean | -2.76 | 59 | 58 |





