








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 540 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 176 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 78 matches | ||
| Premier | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4379 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,677 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3135 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3911 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4609 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 5022 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,012,821 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 327 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AnJIN | 56% | 198 |
| #2 | goodgirl | 56% | 284 |
| #3 | sesam1us | 52% | 133 |
| #4 | Bulletdrop96 | 52% | 259 |
| #5 | ♱D3toX♱ | 51% | 135 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Paiin | 58 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | TerrorKrümel | 20 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | sesam1us | 17 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | goodgirl | 12 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Bulletdrop96 | 12 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Paiin | 1124 | 0.11 | 27 min |
| #2 | sesam1us | 515 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #3 | AnJIN | 443 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #4 | TerrorKrümel | 343 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #5 | ♱D3toX♱ | 292 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sesam1us | +4.91 | 78 | 68 |
| #2 | ♱D3toX♱ | +3.90 | 88 | 68 |
| #3 | Paiin | +2.19 | 85 | 62 |
| #4 | AnJIN | +1.61 | 79 | 58 |
| #5 | TerrorKrümel | +0.05 | 50 | 58 |





