








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 67 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 120 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2862 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,362 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1641 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2026 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3182 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3513 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $897,605 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chrEEz | 50% | 30 |
| #2 | opendeur | 45% | 95 |
| #3 | Bleach | 45% | 124 |
| #4 | Mytt3 | 44% | 79 |
| #5 | yeEhAmMer | 44% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⛟ Van Man ⛟ | +3.50 | 74 | 39 |
| #2 | Mytt3 | +2.11 | 63 | 66 |
| #3 | opendeur | +1.96 | 76 | 68 |
| #4 | tanorY | +0.67 | 54 | 64 |
| #5 | chrEEz | +0.27 | 63 | 56 |





