








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 381 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 212 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2452 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,719 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5722 | 39% |
| Smokes | 3840 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2338 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2819 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $538,716 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wuyu | 78% | 18 |
| #2 | 浪人 | 72% | 58 |
| #3 | quarky | 71% | 48 |
| #4 | TastesLikeMeat | 70% | 20 |
| #5 | racooooon | 68% | 71 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | MadMat | 48% | 79 |
| #13 | rabe | 35% | 34 |
| #14 | Roxxon | 32% | 28 |
| #15 | Deu7 | 31% | 26 |
| #16 | Haftbob Schwammbefehl | 30% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rabe | 11 | 0.0151 |
| #2 | Deu7 | 5 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | putin bad | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | 浪人 | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | KlappmesserToni | 4 | 0.0076 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MRxRED | 628 | 0.16 | 19 min |
| #2 | Rubyi | 370 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #3 | putin bad | 368 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #4 | 浪人 | 340 | 0.27 | 9 min |
| #5 | MadMat | 312 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | racooooon | +2.78 | 79 | 66 |
| #2 | quarky | +2.27 | 88 | 81 |
| #3 | 浪人 | +1.87 | 86 | 68 |
| #4 | Rubyi | +1.62 | 76 | 70 |
| #5 | MRxRED | +1.45 | 82 | 78 |





