








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 575 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 281 matches | ||
| Premier | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 135 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4533 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,563 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4249 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3469 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3390 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4455 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,115,385 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 58 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rayz | 62% | 53 |
| #2 | quarky | 61% | 94 |
| #3 | MRxRED | 57% | 214 |
| #4 | KlappmesserToni | 56% | 55 |
| #5 | Rubyi | 55% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | racooooon | 50% | 36 |
| #12 | rabe | 50% | 50 |
| #13 | MadMat | 50% | 94 |
| #14 | goodvibermo | 48% | 33 |
| #15 | Haftbob Schwammbefehl | 29% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rabe | 10 | 0.0108 |
| #2 | KlappmesserToni | 7 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | Bob G | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Deu7 | 5 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | goodvibermo | 3 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bob G | 1110 | 0.36 | 29 min |
| #2 | MRxRED | 772 | 0.16 | 24 min |
| #3 | MadMat | 349 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #4 | quarky | 313 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #5 | Rubyi | 312 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | quarky | +1.99 | 88 | 81 |
| #2 | racooooon | +1.86 | 84 | 69 |
| #3 | Rubyi | +1.77 | 73 | 74 |
| #4 | putin bad | +1.68 | 88 | 62 |
| #5 | MRxRED | +1.40 | 82 | 79 |





