








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 125 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Faceit | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4093 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,622 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3712 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3311 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3579 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3020 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $696,868 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 705 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jesperwow | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | Prettige Pikpap | 55% | 38 |
| #3 | Pergamon | 55% | 44 |
| #4 | Jaro | 54% | 225 |
| #5 | Dean | 52% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | LuckyLuke | 47% | 51 |
| #9 | MillieWillyGamer | 47% | 32 |
| #10 | BOT Gizmoo | 46% | 142 |
| #11 | Manosaki | 46% | 78 |
| #12 | Bread | 39% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaro | 12 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | BOT Gizmoo | 8 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Pergamon | 5 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | Prettige Pikpap | 4 | 0.0052 |
| #5 | LuckyLuke | 2 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaro | 643 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #2 | BOT Gizmoo | 343 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #3 | Manosaki | 99 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | Skillerone | 86 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #5 | LuckyLuke | 69 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jecky | +3.15 | 88 | 65 |
| #2 | Jaro | +1.59 | 75 | 60 |
| #3 | Skillerone | +0.03 | 69 | 63 |
| #4 | BOT Gizmoo | -0.38 | 66 | 50 |
| #5 | Manosaki | -0.61 | 80 | 54 |





