








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 933 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 201 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 162 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 118 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 21 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6928 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,498 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6273 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4520 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 8715 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 7990 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,794,426 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2531 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | On Top of The World | 29 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | Liloh | 23 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | daLwOo | 14 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | Horkrine | 12 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | jack | 12 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Horkrine | 1061 | 0.11 | 25 min |
| #2 | On Top of The World | 964 | 0.14 | 25 min |
| #3 | daLwOo | 447 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #4 | Liloh | 402 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #5 | Zaytix | 344 | 0.03 | 7 min |





