








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 294 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 214 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 88 matches | ||
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




167 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4071 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,542 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2284 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1075 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 2911 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4272 | 41% |
Our logs show you have wasted $208,487 of utility $23 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 875 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wrocław tweaker | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | barrett | 61% | 87 |
| #3 | hR | 60% | 303 |
| #4 | sneeze30 | 60% | 45 |
| #5 | Thrasher? | 59% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Thrasher? | 59% | 107 |
| #6 | .jib | 59% | 46 |
| #7 | Unc | 57% | 138 |
| #8 | shift | 55% | 31 |
| #9 | Tuna | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hR | 78 | 0.0136 |
| #2 | Unc | 49 | 0.0184 |
| #3 | .jib | 30 | 0.0359 |
| #4 | Thrasher? | 16 | 0.0077 |
| #5 | barrett | 14 | 0.0082 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hR | 978 | 0.17 | 25 min |
| #2 | Unc | 174 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | Thrasher? | 139 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | sneeze30 | 137 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | barrett | 112 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wrocław tweaker | +4.19 | 70 | 35 |
| #2 | hR | +3.48 | 73 | 53 |
| #3 | Thrasher? | +3.07 | 83 | 45 |
| #4 | barrett | +2.50 | 71 | 45 |
| #5 | shift | +2.41 | 72 | 42 |





