








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 338 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 122 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2648 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,971 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1157 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2084 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1318 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1412 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,804,653 of utility $219 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 123 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pearit | 70% | 30 |
| #2 | Asad | 53% | 38 |
| #3 | Mouse6162142 | 50% | 207 |
| #4 | femboy | 47% | 140 |
| #5 | Jerk4Kirk | 47% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mouse6162142 | 15 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | LemonMoose | 12 | 0.0078 |
| #3 | femboy | 11 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | MuscleRelaxerDan | 9 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | Bidoof | 8 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | femboy | 500 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #2 | Mouse6162142 | 492 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #3 | Gorilla_Slavery.com | 186 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #4 | CumOnTits | 167 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | Bidoof | 152 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mouse6162142 | +5.90 | 86 | 52 |
| #2 | LemonMoose | +1.94 | 74 | 43 |
| #3 | femboy | +1.61 | 62 | 61 |
| #4 | Gorilla_Slavery.com | +1.49 | 81 | 60 |
| #5 | misschf29 | +1.01 | 57 | 43 |





