








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 23 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
830 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,154 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 473 | 15% |
| Smokes | 459 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 1167 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 1055 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $443,815 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Stoner Blonox✪ | 42% | 52 |
| #4 | .olemeister | 41% | 82 |
| #5 | ButterSchlecker | 40% | 58 |
| #6 | Gaming_Ingo | 37% | 101 |
| #7 | beng | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .olemeister | 10 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | Gaming_Ingo | 6 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | ButterSchlecker | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Stoner Blonox✪ | 3 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | dennis ygor | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gaming_Ingo | 391 | 0.21 | 13 min |
| #2 | dennis ygor | 194 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | ButterSchlecker | 116 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | .olemeister | 101 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Stoner Blonox✪ | 42 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gaming_Ingo | +1.97 | 83 | 77 |
| #2 | dennis ygor | +1.19 | 71 | 71 |
| #3 | ButterSchlecker | +0.71 | 69 | 64 |
| #4 | Stoner Blonox✪ | +0.34 | 68 | 54 |
| #5 | .olemeister | +0.22 | 78 | 55 |





