








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1322 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 152 matches | 1,986 | |
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 114 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2975 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,970 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1870 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2577 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2945 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2578 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $859,015 of utility $166 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1048 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fjudde | 51% | 76 |
| #2 | Stiin | 50% | 113 |
| #3 | Wolfart | 49% | 147 |
| #4 | conny.p | 48% | 46 |
| #5 | sKy | 46% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wolfart | 1 | 0.0003 |
| #2 | Conny | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wolfart | 834 | 0.26 | 26 min |
| #2 | Stiin | 300 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #3 | sKy | 229 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | conny.p | 175 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #5 | Conny | 162 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DALA♞ | +2.59 | 72 | 72 |
| #2 | Wolfart | +1.68 | 66 | 81 |
| #3 | conny.p | +0.17 | 72 | 64 |
| #4 | Fjudde | -0.72 | 70 | 66 |
| #5 | Stiin | -0.86 | 74 | 72 |





