








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 602 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 191 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4433 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,182 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2607 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2829 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2348 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2398 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $909,307 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 707 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Certified | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | Bogey | 58% | 31 |
| #3 | Gen1e | 57% | 51 |
| #4 | AndeZ | 55% | 107 |
| #5 | Kr1l3 | 55% | 147 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Bogey | 58% | 31 |
| #3 | Gen1e | 57% | 51 |
| #4 | AndeZ | 55% | 107 |
| #5 | Kr1l3 | 55% | 147 |
| #6 | Panda Plovpenning | 50% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AndeZ | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Kr1l3 | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Gen1e | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Bogey | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Certified | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kr1l3 | 366 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #2 | AndeZ | 247 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | Gen1e | 117 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | Bogey | 90 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | Certified | 89 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Twuuu | +2.62 | 90 | 58 |
| #2 | Gen1e | +1.22 | 66 | 54 |
| #3 | Kr1l3 | +0.56 | 84 | 66 |
| #4 | Bogey | +0.18 | 54 | 69 |
| #5 | AndeZ | -0.57 | 55 | 65 |





