








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 255 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 297 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2533 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,352 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2887 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2618 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3357 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2490 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,227,322 of utility $240 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 695 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DiamondAngel02 | 59% | 37 |
| #2 | Kragen | 53% | 68 |
| #3 | Twuuu | 50% | 24 |
| #4 | Gen1e | 47% | 165 |
| #5 | AndeZ | 46% | 253 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Bogey | 44% | 243 |
| #10 | Th3Handler | 41% | 29 |
| #11 | Kr1l3 | 41% | 66 |
| #12 | Certified | 36% | 110 |
| #13 | Call of Nocker | 26% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gen1e | 12 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | Bogey | 11 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | AndeZ | 10 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | DiamondAngel02 | 5 | 0.0065 |
| #5 | Twuuu | 5 | 0.0104 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AndeZ | 578 | 0.11 | 17 min |
| #2 | Bogey | 566 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #3 | Gen1e | 407 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #4 | Certified | 407 | 0.19 | 9 min |
| #5 | Kr1l3 | 175 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 【 ͡❛ ͜ʖ ͡❛】 | +3.39 | 85 | 71 |
| #2 | Twuuu | +3.22 | 92 | 61 |
| #3 | DiamondAngel02 | +2.62 | 77 | 64 |
| #4 | Gen1e | +1.91 | 72 | 64 |
| #5 | Kr1l3 | +1.81 | 82 | 66 |





