








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1333 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 514 matches | ||
| Wingman | 142 matches | ||
| Faceit | 99 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 62 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8784 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,760 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2121 | 10% |
| Smokes | 3886 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 9439 | 43% |
| Molotovs | 6314 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,815,715 of utility $166 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 27 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K.A.I.Z | 63% | 57 |
| #2 | M. | 55% | 258 |
| #3 | boog | 50% | 263 |
| #4 | HelteN | 49% | 71 |
| #5 | Sipex <><]]! | 49% | 198 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Skumleli | 48% | 65 |
| #10 | TIBOOS ✌ | 48% | 42 |
| #11 | MystiQue | 47% | 281 |
| #12 | capri | 46% | 80 |
| #13 | Erik | 42% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sipex <><]]! | 9 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | MystiQue | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | EazyPanda♿ | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | M. | 6 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | Skaru | 5 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MystiQue | 1262 | 0.21 | 39 min |
| #2 | Skaru | 814 | 0.19 | 18 min |
| #3 | EazyPanda♿ | 614 | 0.20 | 17 min |
| #4 | Sipex <><]]! | 392 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #5 | M. | 390 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FD GoD | +1.75 | 72 | 54 |
| #2 | HelteN | +1.35 | 70 | 65 |
| #3 | M. | +0.47 | 64 | 62 |
| #4 | MystiQue | +0.40 | 56 | 81 |
| #5 | K.A.I.Z | +0.19 | 79 | 59 |





