








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 11 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2170 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,350 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 796 | 18% |
| Smokes | 944 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1296 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1314 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $321,533 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | howareyou | 70% | 151 |
| #6 | Spudz | 70% | 151 |
| #7 | DRAKE | 67% | 112 |
| #8 | special k | 64% | 11 |
| #9 | ZYPHERUS | 61% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spudz | 23 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | howareyou | 17 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | DRAKE | 11 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Keyboard go CLACKCLACK | 4 | 0.0089 |
| #5 | red | 2 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ant | +3.57 | 82 | 62 |
| #2 | Spudz | +1.18 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | ZYPHERUS | +0.91 | 91 | 65 |
| #4 | red | +0.73 | 70 | 66 |
| #5 | howareyou | +0.60 | 77 | 71 |





