








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 494 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 107 matches | ||
| Faceit | 71 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2660 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,423 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2983 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1954 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2230 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2256 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $382,837 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 100 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CharLees | 62% | 77 |
| #2 | kielle | 59% | 117 |
| #3 | Mug1wara | 58% | 76 |
| #4 | Svarthumor | 53% | 88 |
| #5 | Space | 50% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | kielle | 59% | 117 |
| #3 | Mug1wara | 58% | 76 |
| #4 | Svarthumor | 53% | 88 |
| #5 | Space | 50% | 22 |
| #6 | ¡Adios! vaand4L | 46% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Svarthumor | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #2 | Space | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kielle | 376 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #2 | Mug1wara | 276 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #3 | Svarthumor | 214 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | CharLees | 151 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Space | 60 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mug1wara | +1.99 | 81 | 76 |
| #2 | edde | +1.28 | 79 | 73 |
| #3 | CharLees | +0.37 | 78 | 59 |
| #4 | kielle | +0.00 | 59 | 75 |
| #5 | Space | -0.10 | 83 | 47 |





