








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 263 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 178 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2294 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,497 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2015 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2260 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2122 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2100 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $702,638 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 226 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | meisenb | 57% | 58 |
| #2 | PUMA D KINQ | 57% | 167 |
| #3 | Pray.- | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | SmollDwagun | 56% | 50 |
| #5 | BOSS | 54% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Pray.- | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | SmollDwagun | 56% | 50 |
| #5 | BOSS | 54% | 28 |
| #6 | NoKXeN | 53% | 135 |
| #7 | Matrix.exe | 50% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PUMA D KINQ | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | meisenb | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | NoKXeN | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | BOSS | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PUMA D KINQ | 551 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #2 | meisenb | 215 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #3 | NoKXeN | 214 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | SmollDwagun | 189 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | Matrix.exe | 95 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | meisenb | +1.99 | 75 | 74 |
| #2 | NoKXeN | +0.86 | 76 | 55 |
| #3 | BOSS | +0.79 | 64 | 76 |
| #4 | HackerClan™ | +0.45 | 63 | 62 |
| #5 | PUMA D KINQ | -0.09 | 41 | 66 |





