








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 24 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
925 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,729 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1145 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1335 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 495 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 754 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $333,439 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Grzechuj ✪ | 65% | 51 |
| #2 | ✪☭☭Frychuj☭☭✪ | 60% | 87 |
| #3 | Ćn3k | 52% | 29 |
| #4 | ✪MakDick✪ | 50% | 68 |
| #5 | Gudlaj | 49% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Ćn3k | 52% | 29 |
| #4 | ✪MakDick✪ | 50% | 68 |
| #5 | Gudlaj | 49% | 99 |
| #6 | Mondek | 45% | 53 |
| #7 | Andrew13 | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gudlaj | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | ✪☭☭Frychuj☭☭✪ | 4 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | ✪MakDick✪ | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | ✪ Grzechuj ✪ | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #5 | Mondek | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gudlaj | 497 | 0.26 | 9 min |
| #2 | ✪☭☭Frychuj☭☭✪ | 191 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | ✪ Grzechuj ✪ | 128 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | ✪MakDick✪ | 123 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Mondek | 119 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪☭☭Frychuj☭☭✪ | +3.87 | 74 | 61 |
| #2 | ✪ Grzechuj ✪ | +2.34 | 54 | 63 |
| #3 | PhasMid | +0.40 | 56 | 60 |
| #4 | Gudlaj | -0.19 | 66 | 64 |
| #5 | Ćn3k | -0.67 | 64 | 39 |





