








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 412 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 113 matches | ||
| Premier | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4651 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,376 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3179 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2527 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 4154 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 2516 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,129,863 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 147 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Gudlaj | 51% | 376 |
| #6 | PhasMid | 50% | 68 |
| #7 | lipa | 47% | 99 |
| #8 | Mondek | 44% | 257 |
| #9 | Ćn3k | 39% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gudlaj | 28 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | ✪☭☭Frychuj☭☭✪ | 24 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Mondek | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | lipa | 7 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | ✪ Grzechuj ✪ | 6 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gudlaj | 1685 | 0.22 | 32 min |
| #2 | ✪☭☭Frychuj☭☭✪ | 787 | 0.10 | 21 min |
| #3 | Mondek | 723 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #4 | ✪ Grzechuj ✪ | 445 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #5 | PhasMid | 189 | 0.15 | 5 min |





