








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 78 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 178 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5075 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,526 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4569 | 48% |
| Smokes | 2579 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 365 | 4% |
| Molotovs | 2013 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,111,531 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 134 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emi >:3 | 48% | 123 |
| #2 | Rapier | 47% | 131 |
| #3 | Faye ~ ♡ :3 | 46% | 95 |
| #4 | Amber | 44% | 27 |
| #5 | duffrose | 41% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Rapier | 47% | 131 |
| #3 | Faye ~ ♡ :3 | 46% | 95 |
| #4 | Amber | 44% | 27 |
| #5 | duffrose | 41% | 78 |
| #6 | AИИA ^^ (CS) | 39% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emi >:3 | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | Faye ~ ♡ :3 | 6 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Rapier | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Amber | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Faye ~ ♡ :3 | 622 | 0.32 | 13 min |
| #2 | Rapier | 182 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | emi >:3 | 64 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | AИИA ^^ (CS) | 51 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | duffrose | 42 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rapier | +4.84 | 76 | 55 |
| #2 | gabe | +0.98 | 80 | 47 |
| #3 | emi >:3 | +0.77 | 45 | 34 |
| #4 | Faye ~ ♡ :3 | -1.13 | 48 | 61 |
| #5 | AИИA ^^ (CS) | -2.04 | 48 | 51 |





