








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2219 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 428 matches | ||
| Faceit | 203 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7603 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,744 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10616 | 31% |
| Smokes | 9265 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5433 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 8430 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,539,971 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 288 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | murf | 58% | 77 |
| #2 | Pander | 57% | 63 |
| #3 | Lucauwio | 57% | 105 |
| #4 | AREKRAM | 56% | 52 |
| #5 | mattybur | 55% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | mattybur | 55% | 44 |
| #6 | Caf | 54% | 39 |
| #7 | MF_James | 53% | 115 |
| #8 | Brodobagins | 51% | 45 |
| #9 | -txN | 51% | 126 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -txN | 15 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | MF_James | 8 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Caf | 4 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | murf | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Lucauwio | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MF_James | 529 | 0.22 | 15 min |
| #2 | Lucauwio | 353 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #3 | -txN | 247 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | Pander | 221 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #5 | murf | 201 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | murf | +2.09 | 86 | 52 |
| #2 | Lucauwio | +1.74 | 70 | 69 |
| #3 | AREKRAM | +1.68 | 81 | 29 |
| #4 | Qlipzi | +0.81 | 82 | 75 |
| #5 | Caf | -0.33 | 74 | 81 |





