








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 82 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
334 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,117 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 248 | 22% |
| Smokes | 47 | 4% |
| HE Grenades | 335 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 487 | 44% |
Our logs show you have wasted $259,157 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | honq | 37% | 59 |
| #5 | Djecco | 37% | 60 |
| #6 | Devil Thing | 33% | 6 |
| #7 | HiddeBD | 28% | 25 |
| #8 | silly | 18% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | honq | 12 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | Djecco | 8 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | silly | 4 | 0.0192 |
| #4 | Devil Thing | 3 | 0.0248 |
| #5 | HiddeBD | 2 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | honq | +3.81 | 66 | 58 |
| #2 | FireSky | +3.78 | 76 | 57 |
| #3 | Devil Thing | +0.88 | 58 | 51 |
| #4 | Djecco | +0.73 | 52 | 62 |
| #5 | el rhéba quid kjadjät | -1.39 | 47 | 35 |





