








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 54 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1747 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,710 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 787 | 29% |
| Smokes | 693 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 252 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 978 | 36% |
Our logs show you have wasted $425,924 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 673 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fricks | 60% | 35 |
| #2 | twitch.tv/BinaryHorizon | 52% | 21 |
| #3 | M1sterChaos | 50% | 12 |
| #4 | gellyyy | 50% | 20 |
| #5 | gloryd | 49% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Demonara | 6 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Sepicraze | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | gloryd | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | gellyyy | 3 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | trooser | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sepicraze | 305 | 0.26 | 8 min |
| #2 | ʎʞɔnp | 216 | 0.39 | 5 min |
| #3 | BonBonVal | 138 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #4 | justhoohaa | 106 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | gloryd | 103 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | justhoohaa | +7.31 | 83 | 65 |
| #2 | Basher | +6.06 | 79 | 53 |
| #3 | TheSimeolin | +6.03 | 98 | 30 |
| #4 | ʎʞɔnp | +2.54 | 54 | 62 |
| #5 | morde24 | +2.47 | 81 | 70 |





