








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1101 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 128 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3251 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,895 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2697 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2631 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2307 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2260 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,309,619 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 392 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FowFox | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | Grakron | 52% | 112 |
| #3 | DevotedG | 50% | 30 |
| #4 | St1mple | 50% | 66 |
| #5 | Shr1ke | 50% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | St1mple | 50% | 66 |
| #5 | Shr1ke | 50% | 70 |
| #6 | 🚬🌿✪StressedOut✪🌿🚬 | 46% | 26 |
| #7 | PotatoFiend | 44% | 45 |
| #8 | SammyP™❄ | 37% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grakron | 10 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Shr1ke | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | St1mple | 5 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | 🚬🌿✪StressedOut✪🌿🚬 | 3 | 0.0054 |
| #5 | SammyP™❄ | 2 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shr1ke | 193 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #2 | 🚬🌿✪StressedOut✪🌿🚬 | 131 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #3 | Grakron | 130 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | SammyP™❄ | 122 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | PotatoFiend | 76 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shr1ke | +4.92 | 59 | 74 |
| #2 | 🚬🌿✪StressedOut✪🌿🚬 | +4.37 | 75 | 44 |
| #3 | Grakron | +2.44 | 82 | 50 |
| #4 | SammyP™❄ | +2.03 | 41 | 44 |
| #5 | PotatoFiend | +0.99 | 47 | 61 |





