








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 728 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 197 matches | ||
| Faceit | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5264 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,236 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2418 | 13% |
| Smokes | 5430 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5381 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 5007 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,768,852 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 611 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JTrops | 68% | 197 |
| #2 | hostage1337 | 66% | 179 |
| #3 | Gumboot | 62% | 465 |
| #4 | Frog Lord | 62% | 203 |
| #5 | B1gDaddyA | 62% | 359 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | B1gDaddyA | 62% | 359 |
| #6 | strelok_ | 61% | 95 |
| #7 | Mr. Mutton | 61% | 452 |
| #8 | Tryst | 61% | 125 |
| #9 | Zeyronex | 50% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B1gDaddyA | 78 | 0.0107 |
| #2 | hostage1337 | 18 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | JTrops | 15 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | Gumboot | 10 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Mr. Mutton | 7 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr. Mutton | 3040 | 0.33 | 103 min |
| #2 | Gumboot | 766 | 0.08 | 21 min |
| #3 | JTrops | 679 | 0.17 | 19 min |
| #4 | Tryst | 481 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #5 | B1gDaddyA | 371 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JTrops | +2.97 | 75 | 71 |
| #2 | B1gDaddyA | +2.64 | 76 | 42 |
| #3 | Mr. Mutton | +1.51 | 63 | 86 |
| #4 | J@CK XDDD | +0.86 | 64 | 54 |
| #5 | hostage1337 | +0.54 | 80 | 48 |





