








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1359 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 165 matches | ||
| Faceit | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5994 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,879 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12736 | 34% |
| Smokes | 10407 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6777 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 7959 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $895,686 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 315 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JTrops | 66% | 214 |
| #2 | hostage1337 | 66% | 145 |
| #3 | B1gDaddyA | 63% | 341 |
| #4 | Gumboot | 62% | 489 |
| #5 | J@CK XDDD | 61% | 452 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Tryst | 59% | 132 |
| #8 | strelok_ | 57% | 95 |
| #9 | Zeyronex | 40% | 73 |
| #10 | ANonMoose | 34% | 67 |
| #11 | Risky Businessman | 29% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | B1gDaddyA | 62 | 0.0089 |
| #2 | JTrops | 19 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | hostage1337 | 16 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | J@CK XDDD | 15 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Gumboot | 11 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gumboot | 709 | 0.07 | 18 min |
| #2 | JTrops | 673 | 0.15 | 19 min |
| #3 | J@CK XDDD | 485 | 0.05 | 11 min |
| #4 | Tryst | 451 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #5 | B1gDaddyA | 366 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JTrops | +2.83 | 77 | 66 |
| #2 | B1gDaddyA | +2.60 | 75 | 41 |
| #3 | Mr. Mutton | +1.85 | 64 | 83 |
| #4 | J@CK XDDD | +0.70 | 63 | 55 |
| #5 | hostage1337 | +0.57 | 83 | 49 |





