








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 119 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 101 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1730 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,042 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1697 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2088 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1738 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1519 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,253,203 of utility $214 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 92 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kosto | 58% | 57 |
| #2 | maradona10x | 57% | 56 |
| #3 | Ban ends: 06 Feb 2023 | 55% | 139 |
| #4 | M1LNESS | 54% | 108 |
| #5 | meya | 53% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ban ends: 06 Feb 2023 | 15 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | Khalisa | 13 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | kosto | 5 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | noone | 4 | 0.0084 |
| #5 | M1LNESS | 3 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ban ends: 06 Feb 2023 | 566 | 0.22 | 15 min |
| #2 | M1LNESS | 324 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | Khalisa | 231 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | maradona10x | 198 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | NESTAČILO ENJOYER | 187 | 0.21 | 5 min |





