










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1337 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 433 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 89 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8121 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 36,149 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 16086 | 44% |
| Smokes | 9644 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3340 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 7079 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,299,397 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 929 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .aZ | 65% | 49 |
| #2 | 2Rare2die | 64% | 134 |
| #3 | Krex ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ | 61% | 124 |
| #4 | simpel | 60% | 297 |
| #5 | Pepe Smõud | 59% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Æя | 57% | 65 |
| #8 | HydRa. | 57% | 187 |
| #9 | BESTEST BOI | 56% | 64 |
| #10 | XAx | 56% | 117 |
| #11 | RedEye ツ | 53% | 236 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | simpel | 20 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | XAx | 9 | 0.0039 |
| #3 | Pepe Smõud | 7 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | RedEye ツ | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Thenoperino | 6 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | simpel | 1238 | 0.22 | 31 min |
| #2 | HydRa. | 639 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #3 | RedEye ツ | 368 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #4 | Thenoperino | 350 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #5 | Krex ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ | 340 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smツe❤ | +3.01 | 90 | 71 |
| #2 | XAx | +2.94 | 84 | 56 |
| #3 | HydRa. | +1.71 | 81 | 68 |
| #4 | Krex ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ | +1.17 | 58 | 65 |
| #5 | Pepe Smõud | +0.96 | 82 | 66 |





