








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1100 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 470 matches | ||
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 309 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5974 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,823 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6473 | 28% |
| Smokes | 6257 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5169 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4924 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,577,743 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1325 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | oleven | 52% | 69 |
| #11 | simpel | 52% | 66 |
| #12 | BESTEST BOI | 50% | 212 |
| #13 | ReikZ | 49% | 49 |
| #14 | taun tartu luud | 48% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BESTEST BOI | 10 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Smツe❤ | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | taun tartu luud | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | simpel | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | ReikZ | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smツe❤ | 1087 | 0.28 | 31 min |
| #2 | BESTEST BOI | 399 | 0.09 | 13 min |
| #3 | simpel | 301 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #4 | Kobistaja | 272 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | taun tartu luud | 213 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sneed | +2.64 | 83 | 19 |
| #2 | HydRa. | +1.92 | 80 | 67 |
| #3 | Smツe❤ | +1.67 | 89 | 71 |
| #4 | devilera | +1.31 | 75 | 67 |
| #5 | BESTEST BOI | +0.91 | 75 | 67 |





