








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 740 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 108 matches | ||
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2597 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,383 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1582 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1242 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1771 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1788 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $824,029 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 120 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XAx | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | simpel | 71% | 87 |
| #3 | Smツe❤ | 64% | 134 |
| #4 | HydRa. | 63% | 16 |
| #5 | Krex ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ | 62% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Smツe❤ | 64% | 134 |
| #4 | HydRa. | 63% | 16 |
| #5 | Krex ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ | 62% | 42 |
| #6 | RedEye ツ | 59% | 100 |
| #7 | Thenoperino | 57% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | simpel | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | RedEye ツ | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Smツe❤ | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Krex ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Thenoperino | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Smツe❤ | 711 | 0.27 | 20 min |
| #2 | simpel | 333 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #3 | RedEye ツ | 170 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | Krex ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ | 111 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Thenoperino | 77 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XAx | +5.38 | 87 | 55 |
| #2 | Smツe❤ | +4.12 | 90 | 72 |
| #3 | HydRa. | +1.56 | 71 | 68 |
| #4 | 2Rare2die | +0.80 | 68 | 62 |
| #5 | Krex ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ | +0.76 | 60 | 64 |





