








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 22 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 144 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1719 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,452 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 848 | 25% |
| Smokes | 792 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1293 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 519 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $798,652 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bloodyrepp | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | SpookyWeasel | 55% | 121 |
| #3 | #RoadTo0MMR - Meaw | 54% | 59 |
| #4 | Purple Goat Slippers | 51% | 68 |
| #5 | dobri322 | 47% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | SpookyWeasel | 55% | 121 |
| #3 | #RoadTo0MMR - Meaw | 54% | 59 |
| #4 | Purple Goat Slippers | 51% | 68 |
| #5 | dobri322 | 47% | 43 |
| #6 | Okasama3 | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Purple Goat Slippers | 6 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Okasama3 | 6 | 0.0199 |
| #3 | SpookyWeasel | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | dobri322 | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | bloodyrepp | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Purple Goat Slippers | 166 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #2 | SpookyWeasel | 156 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #3 | #RoadTo0MMR - Meaw | 75 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | bloodyrepp | 39 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | Okasama3 | 12 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bloodyrepp | +6.12 | 79 | 71 |
| #2 | #RoadTo0MMR - Meaw | +3.45 | 53 | 54 |
| #3 | doredu | +0.98 | 46 | 44 |
| #4 | Purple Goat Slippers | -0.40 | 54 | 56 |
| #5 | SpookyWeasel | -1.10 | 35 | 40 |





