








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 414 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 811 matches | ||
| Faceit | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 75 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7712 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,927 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6857 | 24% |
| Smokes | 8829 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 7778 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 5463 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,468,187 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 97 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HeyJF | 51% | 528 |
| #2 | DieSeifenoma | 51% | 160 |
| #3 | Wekikbut | 51% | 379 |
| #4 | Chyme | 51% | 79 |
| #5 | FlixZ | 50% | 500 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | DieSeifenoma | 51% | 160 |
| #3 | Wekikbut | 51% | 379 |
| #4 | Chyme | 51% | 79 |
| #5 | FlixZ | 50% | 500 |
| #6 | Lowmaker | 50% | 293 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HeyJF | 34 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | FlixZ | 20 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | DieSeifenoma | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | Wekikbut | 6 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Lowmaker | 4 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HeyJF | 1548 | 0.14 | 38 min |
| #2 | Wekikbut | 1266 | 0.15 | 36 min |
| #3 | FlixZ | 770 | 0.07 | 23 min |
| #4 | Lowmaker | 397 | 0.06 | 11 min |
| #5 | Chyme | 216 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yung lidl | +1.02 | 77 | 62 |
| #2 | HeyJF | +0.85 | 63 | 63 |
| #3 | FlixZ | +0.81 | 55 | 62 |
| #4 | Wekikbut | +0.54 | 48 | 70 |
| #5 | Chyme | -1.67 | 44 | 62 |





