








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 660 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 661 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




91 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8317 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,257 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2101 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1367 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2258 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 531 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,472,653 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 831 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Orion | 51% | 145 |
| #2 | Lunatic | 47% | 544 |
| #3 | McLovin | 46% | 164 |
| #4 | bob ross | 46% | 61 |
| #5 | Itzloki | 42% | 307 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lunatic | 48 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | bob ross | 25 | 0.0195 |
| #3 | McLovin | 24 | 0.0068 |
| #4 | Itzloki | 22 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | z1n | 20 | 0.0130 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lunatic | 1235 | 0.11 | 28 min |
| #2 | ✪ Orion | 435 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #3 | z1n | 347 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #4 | McLovin | 300 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #5 | Itzloki | 265 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Orion | +1.38 | 54 | 62 |
| #2 | Lunatic | +1.32 | 66 | 51 |
| #3 | Sk28 | +0.13 | 16 | 30 |
| #4 | z1n | -0.70 | 64 | 29 |
| #5 | McLovin | -0.75 | 52 | 61 |





