








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
731 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,971 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 481 | 16% |
| Smokes | 881 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1012 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 597 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $412,011 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | evil jewish dragon | 50% | 36 |
| #2 | Ghost | 43% | 86 |
| #3 | EgoX | 43% | 14 |
| #4 | хдШеепы | 43% | 101 |
| #5 | BBence | 43% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | EgoX | 43% | 14 |
| #4 | хдШеепы | 43% | 101 |
| #5 | BBence | 43% | 87 |
| #6 | I am in war | 42% | 62 |
| #7 | ↕Leviszz↕ | 39% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ↕Leviszz↕ | 13 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | BBence | 7 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Ghost | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | хдШеепы | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | EgoX | 2 | 0.0097 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ↕Leviszz↕ | 137 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #2 | I am in war | 125 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | BBence | 63 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #4 | Ghost | 44 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | EgoX | 40 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I am in war | +5.26 | 75 | 61 |
| #2 | BBence | +4.64 | 73 | 52 |
| #3 | EgoX | +2.05 | 85 | 73 |
| #4 | ↕Leviszz↕ | +0.91 | 74 | 51 |
| #5 | Ghost | -0.24 | 48 | 31 |





