








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 280 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 168 matches | ||
| Premier | 102 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3734 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,750 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2430 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3079 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2558 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1683 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,257,508 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 114 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I am in war | 58% | 116 |
| #2 | evil jewish dragon | 53% | 88 |
| #3 | хдШеепы | 53% | 190 |
| #4 | Ghost | 51% | 99 |
| #5 | BBence | 50% | 254 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | хдШеепы | 53% | 190 |
| #4 | Ghost | 51% | 99 |
| #5 | BBence | 50% | 254 |
| #6 | EgoX | 40% | 40 |
| #7 | Hóborc | 39% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BBence | 16 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | хдШеепы | 16 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | evil jewish dragon | 6 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Hóborc | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Ghost | 4 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I am in war | 208 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #2 | BBence | 184 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #3 | EgoX | 121 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | Hóborc | 100 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | Ghost | 59 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I am in war | +4.37 | 74 | 59 |
| #2 | BBence | +3.80 | 78 | 47 |
| #3 | EgoX | +1.14 | 75 | 69 |
| #4 | ↕Leviszz↕ | +0.54 | 74 | 52 |
| #5 | Ghost | -0.49 | 49 | 30 |





