








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 187 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 164 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3056 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,843 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1354 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2303 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 1187 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 999 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $414,896 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | хдШеепы | 62% | 154 |
| #2 | ↕Leviszz↕ | 58% | 116 |
| #3 | evil jewish dragon | 56% | 45 |
| #4 | Ghost | 46% | 112 |
| #5 | Hóborc | 42% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | хдШеепы | 62% | 154 |
| #2 | ↕Leviszz↕ | 58% | 116 |
| #3 | evil jewish dragon | 56% | 45 |
| #4 | Ghost | 46% | 112 |
| #5 | Hóborc | 42% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ↕Leviszz↕ | 10 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | хдШеепы | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Ghost | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | evil jewish dragon | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Hóborc | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ↕Leviszz↕ | 110 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #2 | Hóborc | 93 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | хдШеепы | 57 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #4 | Ghost | 54 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | evil jewish dragon | 8 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I am in war | +4.81 | 74 | 54 |
| #2 | ↕Leviszz↕ | +1.00 | 76 | 55 |
| #3 | Ghost | -0.52 | 51 | 32 |
| #4 | хдШеепы | -2.60 | 41 | 29 |
| #5 | evil jewish dragon | -4.18 | 41 | 21 |





