










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 374 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 128 matches | ||
| Wingman | 88 matches | ||
| Esplay | 6 matches | 2,231 | |
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3182 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,224 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3565 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3106 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1769 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2784 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $592,967 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 81 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tupac Sheeran | 57% | 251 |
| #2 | Hasse | 57% | 107 |
| #3 | Decibel | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | demiGOD | 55% | 166 |
| #5 | Perre™ | 54% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Decibel | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | demiGOD | 55% | 166 |
| #5 | Perre™ | 54% | 57 |
| #6 | crox cs.money | 47% | 45 |
| #7 | 3333L | 42% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tupac Sheeran | 49 | 0.0103 |
| #2 | Decibel | 18 | 0.0300 |
| #3 | demiGOD | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Hasse | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | crox cs.money | 3 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tupac Sheeran | 710 | 0.15 | 16 min |
| #2 | demiGOD | 560 | 0.16 | 17 min |
| #3 | Hasse | 316 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #4 | Decibel | 144 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | crox cs.money | 114 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Maddis | +3.95 | 83 | 66 |
| #2 | Perre™ | +1.35 | 86 | 26 |
| #3 | Tupac Sheeran | +0.60 | 70 | 61 |
| #4 | 3333L | +0.06 | 78 | 63 |
| #5 | crox cs.money | -0.03 | 80 | 57 |





