








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 401 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 140 matches | ||
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3068 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,292 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2761 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3383 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2153 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2995 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,058,280 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 328 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kepa(kko?) | 72% | 32 |
| #2 | Meluksli | 64% | 85 |
| #3 | jarpez | 59% | 56 |
| #4 | c1ku | 59% | 17 |
| #5 | meistern | 58% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | pigm8 | 58% | 134 |
| #7 | RAAKA-Arska | 57% | 228 |
| #8 | Hamtaro | 57% | 21 |
| #9 | PinQu | 56% | 18 |
| #10 | Niemisto | 55% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RAAKA-Arska | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | Niemisto | 7 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | meistern | 4 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RAAKA-Arska | 657 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #2 | meistern | 622 | 0.14 | 17 min |
| #3 | pigm8 | 382 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #4 | Niemisto | 231 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | Meluksli | 224 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meluksli | +2.81 | 76 | 68 |
| #2 | meistern | +1.91 | 83 | 68 |
| #3 | pigm8 | +1.34 | 86 | 55 |
| #4 | c1ku | +0.28 | 71 | 61 |
| #5 | RAAKA-Arska | +0.02 | 79 | 62 |





