








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 221 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1853 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,787 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1035 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1187 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 997 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 568 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $642,931 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 98 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Ville | 51% | 69 |
| #12 | jesus8d | 50% | 20 |
| #13 | Moti:^) | 48% | 40 |
| #14 | meistern | 47% | 15 |
| #15 | m1kkola | 40% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moti:^) | 12 | 0.0140 |
| #2 | m1kkola | 5 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | Topsu | 5 | 0.0070 |
| #4 | Ville | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Leevixiex | 3 | 0.0078 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | e m m e (<3) | 183 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #2 | Ville | 164 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | m1kkola | 139 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | pigm8 | 121 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | RAAKA-Arska | 104 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meluksli | +2.59 | 78 | 66 |
| #2 | Moti:^) | +2.02 | 67 | 62 |
| #3 | pigm8 | +1.80 | 85 | 54 |
| #4 | jarpez | +1.34 | 72 | 58 |
| #5 | m1kkola | +1.31 | 76 | 63 |





