








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 248 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 91 matches | ||
| Premier | 80 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2217 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,734 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2071 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1846 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1968 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1849 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $908,836 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | styLe | 65% | 17 |
| #2 | 'no.0dles | 56% | 41 |
| #3 | Voras | 55% | 44 |
| #4 | Boss Baby | 50% | 171 |
| #5 | Nestoro | 48% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Mig0n | 46% | 192 |
| #8 | ㊙ Al ii ve EU 🍥 | 45% | 80 |
| #9 | Danny | 45% | 29 |
| #10 | show me bubs | 44% | 45 |
| #11 | M4nod3an | 44% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boss Baby | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | M4nod3an | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Mig0n | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Voras | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | 'no.0dles | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mig0n | 631 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #2 | Boss Baby | 495 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | M4nod3an | 339 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #4 | LdW | 210 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #5 | Nestoro | 127 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mig0n | +2.55 | 95 | 66 |
| #2 | Voras | +1.87 | 87 | 62 |
| #3 | ㊙ Al ii ve EU 🍥 | +1.26 | 89 | 61 |
| #4 | styLe | +1.16 | 88 | 66 |
| #5 | LdW | +0.25 | 87 | 70 |





