








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 227 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 91 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1240 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,791 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 415 | 15% |
| Smokes | 855 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 630 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 891 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $265,132 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 42 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ExisteNce010 | 65% | 63 |
| #2 | mommy | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | Sufdon | 61% | 31 |
| #4 | Flare | 61% | 54 |
| #5 | ALOppAA | 58% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Flare | 61% | 54 |
| #5 | ALOppAA | 58% | 36 |
| #6 | BrianvanWessel | 58% | 31 |
| #7 | FSN | 58% | 26 |
| #8 | J1mmyEgg | 57% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flare | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | ALOppAA | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | BrianvanWessel | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | J1mmyEgg | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Flare | 226 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #2 | ExisteNce010 | 222 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | FSN | 141 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #4 | ALOppAA | 137 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #5 | BrianvanWessel | 97 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DiSeReCt | +2.51 | 95 | 47 |
| #2 | ALOppAA | +1.30 | 79 | 71 |
| #3 | J1mmyEgg | +0.49 | 81 | 70 |
| #4 | FSN | +0.26 | 87 | 70 |
| #5 | Flare | +0.19 | 87 | 63 |





