








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 279 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1668 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,930 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 600 | 12% |
| Smokes | 1440 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1831 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 1059 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $491,346 of utility $91 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 300 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ian | 47% | 137 |
| #2 | Topolino | 47% | 144 |
| #3 | et | 46% | 182 |
| #4 | Kai | 44% | 151 |
| #5 | shadow wizard money gang | 44% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | et | 15 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Kai | 15 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | ian | 12 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Topolino | 11 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | shadow wizard money gang | 8 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ian | 579 | 0.21 | 16 min |
| #2 | Topolino | 565 | 0.19 | 17 min |
| #3 | Kai | 279 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #4 | shadow wizard money gang | 214 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #5 | Sam Darnold | 124 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kai | +5.22 | 77 | 63 |
| #2 | Topolino | +3.09 | 77 | 67 |
| #3 | ian | +2.70 | 67 | 66 |
| #4 | Sam Darnold | +0.15 | 57 | 48 |
| #5 | shadow wizard money gang | -1.88 | 52 | 46 |





