








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 555 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 310 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 102 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




69 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7804 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,132 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6320 | 20% |
| Smokes | 8200 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 9887 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 7725 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,500,967 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 202 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FrEaky | 60% | 47 |
| #2 | Zonicol | 47% | 38 |
| #3 | Toonifisch | 47% | 310 |
| #4 | Kruger | 47% | 85 |
| #5 | ChimZ | 46% | 309 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Edfu | 14 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Bunte Tunte | 12 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | marCel | 12 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | ChimZ | 11 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Toonifisch | 9 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ChimZ | 1036 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #2 | Bunte Tunte | 791 | 0.13 | 17 min |
| #3 | marCel | 556 | 0.19 | 19 min |
| #4 | Edfu | 545 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #5 | Toonifisch | 374 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Benken | +1.44 | 63 | 74 |
| #2 | marCel | +0.53 | 76 | 69 |
| #3 | ChimZ | +0.45 | 67 | 63 |
| #4 | Kruger | -0.10 | 68 | 59 |
| #5 | Zonicol | -0.33 | 40 | 60 |





