








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 13 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 84 matches | ||
| Faceit | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1315 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,019 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1582 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1181 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2023 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1233 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $487,512 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NisseFrø- *NoScopeGlasses | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | LaptopTORE | 67% | 21 |
| #3 | eXICKED | 65% | 20 |
| #4 | hEAhK | 64% | 22 |
| #5 | EMPERIUM | 61% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TatoH | 216 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | LaptopTORE | 119 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #3 | hEAhK | 73 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | eXICKED | 72 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | Lundinho | 62 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EMPERIUM | +4.54 | 74 | 74 |
| #2 | TatoH | +3.00 | 83 | 69 |
| #3 | NisseFrø- *NoScopeGlasses | +2.98 | 62 | 69 |
| #4 | LaptopTORE | +1.63 | 76 | 88 |
| #5 | eXICKED | +1.13 | 64 | 50 |





